Reasons

In a discussion with my class last semester, I shared with my students that I don’t believe that “everything happens for a reason.” I understand that many people DO believe it, but I do not.

A student followed up with me: why?

I took her question as an invitation to dissect that belief, or unbelief, as the case may be. I appreciate that there is something to learn from every difficulty. But I don’t see those opportunities as the reasons for the difficulty. The word “reason” speaks to cause or justification. The reason the car wouldn’t start (dead battery). Cause. The reason I chose the chocolate mousse (I love chocolate!). Justification.

The loss of a loved one? A professional setback? A health crisis? There is no cause or justification. Bad things happen.

Dear Sister (DS) says, “you can only do what you can do.” When a bad thing happens, we do what we can. Onward. Don’t lose time looking for a reason.

Here’s a variation on the idea that negative events can have silver linings. This one appeals to the pessimist in me.

“You never know what worse luck your bad luck has saved you from.”

That’s folksy wisdom from the character Uncle Ellis in Cormac McCarthy’s No Country for Old Men.

Or a more positive variation, not even a literary reference, just straight-up Pinterest:

“Life keeps leading us on journeys we would never go on if it were up to us. Don’t be afraid. Find the lessons.”

And my favorite funny take on the idea:

“Everything happens for a reason. But sometimes that reason is that you are stupid and make bad decisions.”

Guffaw!

To keeping our senses of humor, maintaining perspective, and making good decisions in 2025!